TBR

Regretting You

Fourth Wing--So we are in Zoom talking about the Fourth Wing.. Now I am not a GOT fan so am I going to like Fourth Wing if I am not big into GOT? (different authors i Know but similar content maybe?)

Court of Rose and Thorns.

Captivated by You.. written by Sylvia Day...

I have read the first three chapters of Captivated by You the newest novel by Sylvia Day in the Crossfire Series. I have never done a book review before but I was up till midnight reading and as usual for me with this series I can't put it down. I kinda been putting off reading it because I am waiting on the actual release-- that I've prepaid for. Haha! 

The Story of the series is Eva Trammell is a recent college graduate that begins a new life with her best friend in New York City and gets a job with an advertising agency. She runs into quite literally Gideon Cross she doesn't know it at the time but he is a highly driven, dark, sexually charged CEO of entertainment. He has very hands off past with love both Eva and Gideon have suffered through tragic pasts. 

Anyways my first thoughts while reading the first few pages is this is a hard read. I didn't want to put that here because I didn't want my readers to take it literally. Hard read doesn't mean in a War & Peace type of way. Because of Eva and Gideon's past they have to have a Love the Way You Lie type of relationship so its hard for me with my past to read that kind of torturous unhealthy relationship. Like my life what may seem like unhealthy just is the way they/we work. It doesn't take the writer Sylvia Day long to get steamy. I believe there was about 3 steamy scenes in the first three chapters. 

If you would like to get an early head start you can download it on her website here 

What do you think will happen? What will happen with Eva and Gideon? What did you think of the first 3 books? What will happen with Carey? What happened to Megumi?

Fairy tales

So I am on the third book of a book series and my Face Book friends must think I never read because I have been having several status just about this book series. I am currently reading the Crossfire Series by Sylvia Day.. It was highly recommended to me after I finished 50 Shades of Grey but I never picked it up. Honestly I LOVE books I am a classic literature freak... Beowulf, Shakespeare, Edgar Allen Poe... etc. The greats I could get lost. In the Crossfire books the main characters Eva and Gideon have a love that is co dependent and most people would say unhealthy... They can't live without each other and they physically need each other. There are relationships where I've felt that need or felt I needed it in return. There are relationships where I would listen to the sappy love songs and wished that I could dedicate them to someone or they would dedicate them to me. That we would feel like that. That we would feel like the words of our own song. I read an article a few years ago that said the Twilight Romance is unhealthy for marriages because wives begin to expect that type of love out of their romance. What about way before that? What about the romance in movies? Or Romeo and Juliet? What great lengths that Romeo and Juliet would do to be together. Some pieces of 50 Shades of Grey were a lot like my past in a relationship I once had where he was terribly beautifully broken then with Eva and Gideon I think how ironic it is that the characters (even the gay best friend in the book) reflect my own life. No my husband isn't a hunky ribbed ab'd martial artist with billions and he certainly doesn't stalk me (or does he?) He's hunky to me *blush* and the character in the book Gideon possess some very similar traits to +Richard . Some I thought he had when we first were just friends, Some I wished he would have and some he does have. Gideon is like Rick in many different aspects its like a prism. Some of the quotes from the book make me do a face palm because I am like that is so like Rick or Eva your so like me... even though I find her a twit like most female leads in the books I read. I guess that's the going thing for romance novels when that's not me or whom I like at all. I am very independently thinking, strong, take no crap kinda gal... Amelia Earhart, Beatrix Potter... are all some of my favorite women. They didn't follow rules certainly not the ones men or society laid out for them. The women who had the mental abilities and strength of any man but still had the kindest softest heart of a woman.  But that's getting off topic. The girls in the books I read like Bella from Twilight and Eva from these Crossfire books just seem to be puddy in the male hands. No I WON'T Be with you then of course they fall in the next second and give in to every command... ugh.

I saw P!nk on Ellen (another woman I admire) and I had to laugh what P!nk said about her and her relationship. Ellen said well now your happily married. P!nk just laughed and said we are married things aren't always happy. We are REAL. I think that explains my marriage too. Our marriage really seemed fairy tale in the beginning perhaps that's why I am here (haha) I often told him I was on cloud nine... but after the Army, deployments, diagnosis',  a baby and more... we are worn now. Cloud Nine isn't all puffy white clouds and falling is even harder when you've been raised so high and let down before. Our marriage isn't always Romeo and Juliet... it never will be. Its not Bella and Edward, Christian and Ana, Diana and Charles, Grace Kelly and Prince Rainier, Elvis and Priscilla, or even Eva and Gideon. Its Bella and Rick :) Its not always a love song, a poem, or a fairy tale its what's real. We have bills, sickness, work, and stress like everyone else. In ways all those things define us good and bad. We came into this marriage with baggage.. We aren't high school sweet hearts. We aren't each others firsts... nothing fairy tales are laid of... its what real life is made of.

Do I still crave and want a possessive, romantic, knight and shining armor? Yes. Who doesn't?
But I am willing to accept my whole life can't be a Notebook romance.

Books that make an impact

You know I was raised in a church. When I was living with my mom she would load my sisters and I up on a bus and we would go to Pinecrest Baptist Church in Morrow, GA. When I lived with my Guardian I went to church every Sunday that I can remember to Trinity United Church of Christ/ Trinity Community Church. I even went during the week to choir, to youth group, to do the Newsletter, to volunteer. I was at church a lot. But on my journey of learning my faith I've had to learn on my own. I have had to follow my own road. My relationship with my spiritual faith is a very personal, deep, faith. Its unlike any of yours.

So how did the Bible and Gianna impact my life? Well obviously when you attend church you learn about stories in the bible, the history, the future, what God wants for us... etc. That's the easy part to explain. Gianna if your a reader you know I've mentioned that book at least two times. Gianna impacted my life because she is a deeply spiritual woman who didn't let life's challenges or her "deck of cards" change her. I have learned about my own faith through this strong woman. Its been awhile since I read the book but to paraphrase she is asked how do you deal with your issues? She said I give it to God. I wasn't sure what she meant when I read the book. Through my own challenges of life I had to learn it myself. I have posted about my journey in Jesus Take The Wheel

Other posts on Gianna:

Book I've Read That Changed My Views On Something

Giving it to God My Journey

What's My Favorite Book and Why

I read this book shortly after I married Rick. The stories in the book put things in a perspective for me that helped me through my deployment. I had to remember what it would have been like for wives of both the World Wars. How extremely HARD it was for Vietnam and Korean wives because their husbands were fighting in unfavorable wars. Unfavorable like Iraq but the Soldiers and Wives didn't get near the lack of support as the Vietnam Wives and Military Men got. I wasn't a whiny mess during deployment. My world didn't fall apart. I raised two kids on my own with little help from my husband. Sure it was nice to be able to speak to him and get money and its different than being a single mom trust me I've been there to but its

 un-explainable and it differs from couple to couple. Was it the book that helped me? I am not sure but it did give me perspective and showed me even a Military Wife was special.

Busy Weekend

Thursday we left for a marriage retreat in Town Creek, AL.. Bought and paid for by the Army... Thank You Uncle Sam. As often as I bitch about you... you can give me something good every once in awhile. It was also sort to speak our last Hooah since it won't be long until Rick retires. Our accomidations were at the Doublehead Resort. In the mornings we had class and in the afternoons we were free to do whatever we wanted. They provided us with meals and it was so nice :). Skylar enjoyed the free time with the other kids and of course getting to run all over outdoors on a nice 70 degree weekend. (its back to being cold now) Saturday we tried to go horseback riding but they were booked up and we couldn't do it as a family so I decided against it. Skylar and I will do it when she is a little bigger. Thats more important to me. Rick decided we should take a short trip to  Tuscumbia, Alabama to see Ivy Green. Which is the birthplace and childhood home of Helen Keller. Beatrix Potter, Amelia Earhart, and Helen Keller are some of my favorite women of history. None of them stuck to what was expected of them but went on to make new expectations of others. As Marilyn Monroe once said. Well Behaved Women Rarely Make History...
It was interesting to walk the steps she took. It was interesting to see the cradle from the stories, The dining room where she had a food fight with Annie Sullivan. Of course the Water Well that we all know so well too!
During the Lessons of the Marriage Retreat I really enjoyed Chaplain Fisher and his wife Sara's stories. His teaching style kept me interested and of course I felt like maybe I talked too much haha! I always have input! The first day we dug in deep to the seven love languages. We even talked about what potential love languages the children have. We went over a little of Dave Ramsey's Total Money Makeover. We are currently enrolled in his class now. We did "The Seven principles for Making Marriage Work" by John Gottman and its not religous based as so many of the other books are. I still have SO many questions but I don't know if Chaplain Fisher has the answers for me. Oh well leave it to me LOL.. But overall it was a great experience.
Rick and I laughed about it on Sunday but they were doing hunting on the resort and we thought mixing that with PTSD was a bad idea haha. I would have liked more socializing as a group. I know its a marriage retreat so it was encouraged that the families spend time with their own but a BBQ or a Bon Fire on the last night would have been nice :)

Looking up!

I rarely watched ABC's "The View" since I wanted to really go off on Rosie O'Donnell whom I used to love by the way. Yesterday my Television happened to be on ABC. I caught Michael J Fox on there. I was very inspired in January by Barbara Walters Patrick Swayze Special. Patrick Swayze is amazing his outlook is amazing. I had a feeling Michael J. Fox would be the same for me. I was write. I caught three quotes I plan on posting in front of my face amongst the one from Extreme Makeover (let me find that one!) and Patrick Swayze's just as a remind that the world isn't against me. That people do love me and you know what... does it matter? Nope!
When life gets you down remember there are people around you that conquer harder battles and don't doubt for a minute God didn't love you so much as to not give you the same amount of strength!

Love Dare and Parenting

So I am on Day 6 of Love Dare me thinks lol... http://bellaslovedare.blogspot.com/
I apparently inspired a friend of mine that lives locally to also do it. We both thought it would be an interesting idea if we had a parenting love dare... I was wondering if I can get some help coming up with daily dares that possibly fit all ages of our children (or not) and see if we can do our own little parenting love dare?

Maybe baby?

Maybe Baby?
Rick and I are unsure about having a 5th child to our full house. So while in a discount book store I picked up Maybe Baby? I was thinking this book might help settle some questions in our heads about whether or not we wanted another child. Just reading through the introduction I have found that this book is and isn't what I thought it was. This book is mainly reflecting on the first born child on whether or not to procreate all together. Clearly we have both procreated twice just not together. Just in the forward and first chapter of the book it talks about people who would like to remain Childless by Choice, Childless due to the inability to have children by themselves, and those who have children by whatever decision they make. However I will keep reading the book in hopes I will find some peace that I am looking for and be able to maybe make a decision by the fall when he is home. I also plan on fully preparing him on the financial strain of having a baby. If by chance I cannot breast feed or if I can... I would buy the hospital grade pump and they are about $300, I've tried others' they don't work. If I cannot breast feed he needs to realize how much formula costs we wouldn't more than likely qualify for WIC. Then all the necessities babies need. Since I know we have the emotional part down of parenting one of our concerns is Financial, My physical limitations, His age, His retirement in the near future, the two older children, and also Mackenzie. Its been 19 years since he has had a baby under his wings. When the boys were babies he worked a lot, was in training, deployed... whatever the Army wanted him to. This time he could be here full-time and not miss anything. Props to the boys mother and grandmother for doing it mostly on their own as they were growing up.So one of the things to keep us busy during R&R are going window shopping and seeing how much everything is. Holding Molly my friends newborn, feeding Molly... a trial run of playing house. LOL We can't predict everything like where would the baby sleep (all though I have some idea's)
So this blog can be an open forum for ya'll.
I don't know many childless married couples by choice. But if your married and childless or unmarried and childless by choice. Leave a Comment and tell me why your childless by Choice

If your married or unmarried and unable to get pregnant. Tell me if you aren't going to seek further help in having a baby or would you be one of those childless by choice due to necessity of extraordinary measures. Leave a comment and tell me your story.

If you have children and remarried. Did you or did you not have children with your current spouse why and why not? If you are divorced. If you were to remarry would you consider having children with your future spouse? Leave a comment and tell me why.

For the parents. How did you know you wanted to be parents with your first born? How did you know you wanted the subsequent children after that? Leave me a comment and tell me why.

The book states "They said that people who choose not to have children (as opposted to those who desperately want to have children but can't) opposed to those who desperately want to have children but can't) tend to have better marriages, better fiances, less s tress, and are no more likely to be unhappy in old age than parents." The chapter touches on the way you loose intimacy with your mate because of the stress and exhaustion. I like my marriage where it is for the most part. Would adding another mouth to feed put a strain on my marriage I don't want to deal with? Or would it bring a new level of joy to my marriage? Another fear and reason for my indecisiveness. What do you think?

See where I am getting at? After reading this book and each chapter talks about the different decisions people make and why. As the front cover of the book says 28 writers tell the truth about skepticism, infertility, baby lust, childlessness, ambivalence, and how they made the biggest decision of their lives.

So write me and tell me how you made the biggest decisions of your life.

Any book worms?

I'd like to connect with you on Goodreads so we can see each other's books. Those Military I have a good reading list for ya'll check it out!

 If your not already signed up for Good Reads

Checkout my reading list on Goodreads - where you can see what your friends are reading. http://www.goodreads.com/friend/i?i=LTM2MDYzMDI0NTQ6MzEz%0A

 If your already on Goodreads.... here is my profile http://www.goodreads.com/profile/StormyAries