Happy Birthday Skylar

Happy Birthday to my princess Skylar.

9 years ago my sister and I were pregnant at the same time. She had twins weighing around 6 lbs each the on the first week of October. I remember that day as much as I remember Skylar's own day of birth. Since she was in labor off and on for over a month I think. I thought I kept having pregnancy symptoms. Finally when she had her babies I really started feeling strong Braxton Hicks. On October 20th I went to L&D with pain. They checked me and said I wasn't very thinned out or dilated much but they felt her "head". They were quite sure her head was down low so that could be causing the discomfort. The next day I went for my usual OB appointment and I told him and he decided to go ahead and do an Ultrasound. I guess it was a type of stress test? They wanted to monitor Skylar being only 36 weeks gestation and I was dilating some, like I was at 3 centimeters. They said she would only weigh 3 or 4 lbs. They didn't think there was any way she would weigh more than 4 lbs. They said they were watching her on Ultrasound to see if she would make movements more than 3 times in thirty minutes. She didn't move in those thirty minutes. The Ultrasound Tech gave the Ultrasound over to the OB who stayed with me. Dr Bailey was the greatest while I was pregnant! With the weight of the news that was a tiny tiny baby and the worried scramble of the Ultrasound Tech and Doctor it didn't help me ease my worry. I knew I was in labor. I knew there was something wrong. I did try to tell them she was probably just sleeping. She wasn't as active as her older brother. Donnie, my boyfriend at the time tried talking to her since she would usually respond to one of our voices. We tried shining a light at her. There was no movement close to 45 minutes. She was also Frank Breech. He talked about an aversion. The thought scared me to death! Eventually he checked me again and I was still about 3 or 4 centimeters dilated. He sent me to L&D to hook me up to the monitors. The OB office was inside Gordon Hospital in Calhoun, GA at the time so I could just walk down the hall way and through the big doors to get to Labor and Delivery. By the time they got me hooked up I dilated to 6. I was dilating quickly and the labor wasn't going as it did when I had my first. General signs I won't go into too much detail here (TMI).. So they paged the doctor and started paperwork for a c-section. There was no time for the aversion and it was too risky now. There wasn't enough time to even have my family there, or the biological father and his family. Donnie made the calls while they were prepping me. They did the epidural spinal block (I disliked that Anesthesiologist long before I was ever in labor by the way.) When the doctor was swabbing my tummy with the iodine? He started poking me with a  sharp object and I said I FEEL THAT! He said oops they pushed Donnie in the OR and back out again and the next thing I know the Anesthesiologist had me by the throat and was giving me gas through the oxygen mask. I had to have general anesthesia. When I started coming too the same thing always bothers me that tube in your throat for stabilization. Once I got that out I was talking to the nurse. My mom had called so I was talking to her. I hadn't yet seen Skylar or Donnie. I heard Donnie in the hall way begging to come in to see me. Finally they let him in. He counted all her fingers and toes for me. 10 each! But he said she had to have an X-ray. I then worried I had never heard of giving a baby an X- Ray. I didn't find out till years later when I actually read her record that she had a problem being born and her first Apgars were very very low. 

Finally they brought her to me and she was perfect just the tiniest baby I have EVER seen in person!

She was due on November 17th but came early on October 21st 

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v396/Sntfrmgod4me2lve/personal%20tags/Picture%20Tags/Bella-Siggy-3.jpg

Yard Sale Day

Today was Yard Sale day so I spent my morning at the yard sale. I tried to make a post while sitting around but the wind was so strong it kept blowing my clothing racks over. I made $50 though! 
We came home enough to change a diaper and let William nap and then I checked the mail before pulling out of the drive way... Its a good thing I did the mall sent me a letter saying someone turned in my wallet! I was heading to post to get my step son from work but I had to have an ID to get on post which was AT THE MALL. The letter said it was only open Monday - Friday. So driving in the car (ok I was a passenger) I canceled credit/debit cards. I picked up my step son outside the gate then I met the girl with the American Doll at a Kroger and I am so elated about the doll! Hehehe. We went back to the mall to see if the security guard could get it for me. I found a cop and asked him and he got a security guard to get my wallet. So nice!!
We played outside with the kids awhile. My wonderful husband made Cracker Barrel Meat loaf yum!

I saw this quote on Facebook and thought it was cute so I stole it and changed the wording!
Was planning to take over the world, then a soldier in a Navy Hat showed up and distracted me! Oh well there's always tomorrow I guess I need to have a tag made.

I know I have a habit but you don't understand

Hello I am Bella I am a shopoholic and I love clothes!
My kids have probably a lot of clothes but I don't know. I need a personal organizer! I watch Hoarders and Clean House and I feel like purging everything I own!
You know those nifty lists they give you when you have a newborn that tell you what to buy -- Like this Baby Checklist 
Why can't they do this for older kids! I feel like I over buy because I am afraid they will grow or they won't have enough. I know they probably don't need more than 7 tops and 7 bottoms enough to get them through a week We all have more than 7 tops and 7 bottoms don't we? I guess I just love clothes and love buying them for my kids. I wish I wasn't having a thyroid and weight problem I would like to dress as nice as they do.

Olive Garden Chicken Gnocchi - Video | CopyKat Recipes | Restaurant Recipes

Olive Garden Chicken Gnocchi - Video | CopyKat Recipes | Restaurant Recipes:

'via Blog this'

Um Yum we had this on Friday. We love the all you can eat soup, salad and bread at OG. Its seriously unhealthy and full of sodium but we really really love this soup.

9/11

Her hair was up in a ponytail... Her favorite dress tied with a bow... Today was Daddy's Day at school... And she couldn't wait to go... But her mommy tried to tell her... That she probably should stay home... Why the kids might not underst and... If she went to school alone... But she was not afraid... She knew just wh...at to say... What to tell her classmates Of why he wasn't there today..... But still her mother worried, For her to face this day alone. And that was why once again, She tried to keep her daughter home. But the little girl went to school, ......Eager to tell them all. About a dad she never sees, A dad who never calls. There were daddies along the wall in back, For everyone to meet Children squirming impatently, Anxious in their seats. One by one the teacher called, Each student from the class. To introduce their daddy, As seconds slowly passed. At last the teacher called her name, Every child turned to stare. Each of them was searching, For a man who wasn't there. "Where's her daddy at?" She heard a boy call out. "She probably doesn't have one" Another student dared to shout. And from somewhere near the back, She heard a daddy say, "Looks like another deadbeat dad, Too busy to waste his day." The words did not offened her, As she smiled up at her mom. And looked back at her teacher, Who told her to go on. And with hands behind her back, Slowly she began to speak. And out from the mouth of a child, Came words incredibly unique. "My daddy couldn't be here, Because he lives so far away. But I know he wishes he could be, Since this is such a special day. And though you cannot meet him, I wanted you to know. All about my daddy, And how much he loves me so. He loved to tell me stories He taught me to ride my bike. He surprised me with pink roses, And taught me to fly a kite. We used to share fudge sundaes, and ice cream in a cone. And though you cannot see him, I'm not standing here alone. Cause my daddy's always with me Even though we are apart. I know because he told me, He'll forever be in my heart." With that, her little hand reached up, and lay across her chest. Feeling her own heartbeat, Beneath her favorite dress. And from somewhere in the crowd of dads, Her mother stood in tears. Proudly watching her daughter, Who was wise beyond her years. For she stood up for the love Of a man not in her life. Doing what was best for her, Doing what was right. And when she dropped her hand back down, Staring straight into the crowd. She finished with a voice so soft, But its message clear and loud. "I love my daddy very much, He's my shining star. And if he could he'd be here, But heaven's just too far. You see he was a fireman And died just this past year. When airplanes hit the towers And taught Americans to fear. But sometimes when I close my eyes, It's like he never went away." And then she closes her eyes, And saw him there that day. And to her mother's amazement, She witnessed with surprise. A room full of daddies and children, All starting to close their eyes. Who knows what they say before them, Who knows what they felt inside. Perhaps for merely a second, They saw him at her side. "I know you're with me Daddy." To the silence she called out. And what happened next made believers, Of those once filled with doubt. Not one in that room could explain it, For each of their eyes had been closed. But there on the desk beside her, Was a fragrant long-stemmed pink rose. And a child was blessed, if only for a moment, By the love of her shining bright star. And given the gift of believing, That heaven is never too far..

Deedle Deedle

For the first two years of Williams life we have had him sleeping in a crib in our room. Since right before his second birthday I decided to convert the crib and move it into his own room. Before we converted the crib we would put him in the crib and he would settle down and go to sleep. Since the conversion there has been more of a bedtime challenge. For the last month we or just one of us sits in his room or right outside the door. It's usually a lot of getting up to play, going into our room, or Skylar's or playing with his train table.
Tonight I went to the store to return the rented movies while Rick gave William a bath. I came in and William saw me. So I decided to help Rick get William down. Tonight didn't start no differently than another. We sat against the empty twin in Williams room (Alex's bed) for awhile. Then we left the room to "throw away the dirty diaper." While in my own room I caught William sneaking out of his a few times. Doing the Jo Frost method, I tuck him back in bed without a word. Like the fourth time he snuck out he came into our room with his head tucked between his shoulders, looked at us with grin and his big brown eyes. He had his hands close to his face. His expression could be explained like when someone talks about money. Rubbing his fingers against his thumb. Maybe to be explained like Gollum from LOTR when he says "my precious." William only said Deddle Deddle Deddle. I went to continue doing what I had been doing and taking him back to his bed. I reached the corner of my bed where he was just to collapse with the giggles. The next half an hour would be one thing to giggle after another. Rick thinks he was saying little more time.

Mother Definition

Moth·er :: A woman in relation to a child or children to whom she has given birth.

For Huntsville couple still grieving son's loss, illegal immigration debate is deeply personal | al.com

For Huntsville couple still grieving son's loss, illegal immigration debate is deeply personal | al.com

Random Thought

If you want something in life you have to work for it. You have to chase it. Anything that you get for free might not be worth fighting for, not worth your time.
I am not a free gift with purchase, I didn't fall in your lap and if you think I did then you under estimate my value. I am not a consolation prize or a Happy Meal toy.

Mean

You used to hold the door for me, now you can't wait to leave
You used to send me flowers if you fucked up in my dreams
I used to make you laugh with all the silly shit I did
But now you roll your eyes and walk away and shake your head

When the spark has gone, and the candles are out
When the song is done and there's no more sound
Whispers turn to yelling, and I�m thinking�

How did we get so mean?
How do we just move on?
How do you feel in the morning when it comes and everything's undone?
Is it cause we wanna be free? Well that's not me
Normally I'm so strong
I just can't wake up on the floor like a thousand times before
Knowing that forever won't be

Always sentimental when I think of how it was
When love was sweet and new and we just couldn't get enough
The shower, it reminds me you'd undress me with your eyes
And now you never touch me and you tell me that you're tired

You know, I get so sad when it all goes bad
And all you think about is all the fun you had
And all those �sorry��s ain't never gonna mean a thing, oh�

How did we get so mean?
How do we just move on?
How do you feel in the morning when it comes and everything's undone?
Is it cause we wanna be free? Well that's not me
Normally I'm so strong
I just can't wake up on the floor like a thousand times before
Knowing that forever won't be

Oh, we said some things that we can never take back
It's like a train wreck, trying to hit the right track
We opened up the wine and we just let it breathe
But we should have drank it down while it was still sweet
It all goes bad eventually�

Now do we stay together cause we're scared to be alone?
We got so used to this abuse, it kind of feels like home
But, my baby, I just really wanna know, oh,

How did we get so mean?
How do we just move on?
How do you feel in the morning when it comes and everything's undone?
Is it cause we wanna be free? Well that's not me
Normally I'm so strong
I just can't wake up on the floor like a thousand times before
Knowing that forever won't be

How do we just move on?
How do you feel in the morning when it comes and everything's undone?
Is it cause we wanna be free? Well that's not me
Normally I'm so strong
I just can't wake up on the floor like a thousand times before
Knowing that forever won't be

Remembering the Past... Embracing the future

‎"There comes a point in your life when you realize who matters, who never did, who won't anymore and who always will. Don't worry about the people from your past, there's a reason why they didn't make it into your future."


a quote Marissa posted on Facebook that was very "me"!

Summer Fun Show Off

Whoa stop the presses! Summer is already over?

What a summer it was too! It seems like yesterday it was April 27th and we had a bad Tornado outbreak in our state and many many people were killed. That was spring! Where did the summer go? My oldest turned 11 and he is starting the 5th grade. My youngest turned 2 last week and my princess is now enjoying her first day of the 2nd grade (I hope!) 

Usually I don't look forward to the summer because Skylar has to always be entertained and that's hard to do on a tight budget. Thankfully Rick and I had a game plan to go into the summer. Sign her up for camps and keep her busy! She had been telling me for months she wanted to go to the Budding Chef Cooking Camp. I thought it was a great idea and I was ready to make it happen. They were located in my down town area but then they moved over to the neighboring city in their down town... which I have a fear of driving in. I was willing to try though. I kept an eye on their calendar, their webpage, I called several times.. but I never could get them to give me straight answers. So that didn't happen. Skylar went to Vacation Bible School and a close by Methodist church I signed her up for when she was friends with the neighbors boy. So they got to see each other in class. Then I found a local gym that was having a Gymnastic camp. That worked out well and she had something to look forward to. We have even signed her up for the fall/winter season!

I think the best thing that could have happened to me (and my kids) was the fact that an indoor playgroup opened up just a few miles down the street from our house. We pay a monthly membership and we went at least 3 or more times a week. We took a couple of trips to Georgia to visit close friends. We had two trips to the zoo in Birmingham and we STILL haven't done everything there. We went to the McWane Science Center in Birmingham and anyone that knows us knows if we drive near or past Fultondale, AL which is just outside of Birmingham we HAVE to eat at Whataburger. We were lucky enough to see Sue the largest T-Rex visiting from Chicago at an exhibit at the Space and Rocket Center. Skylar got a new pet and I lost my pet my bird Lily. Our sad part of our summer is the "school house" is moving to Virginia. When Rick was in the Army he worked at the school house as an instructor. So all of our friends for the past four years are all taking their turn and moving away. Its a hard adjustment... the changes on post are already noticeable. Our friend and her family PCS'd to Germany on Sunday and we had to say goodbye at William's birthday party. We had lots of fun though and I have met some awesome people hopefully they will keep in touch. 

Gymnastics

Learning to Ride a Bike

We had a visit from the largest, most complete T-Rex Sue!

Birthday Party and Fishing with Friends we said goodbye to on Saturday when they PCS'd to Germany.

At the Birmingham Zoo

At the Science Museum

Skylar's new pet

Playing at our Play Place

Happy Birthday Lil Man!

This morning walking to the bus stop

"Link up your Summer Fun for a chance to win prizes from Ubisoft."

William

William loves anything to do with Disney Pixar Cars. He doesn't have the attention span to watch the movies but he does like them. Why don't they make Disney cartoons like they used to? That might hold his attention. Instead we set this up on Rick's computer screen and at any given time William he will sit cross legged in front of the computer monitor and watch the trailer reel that goes continuously http://disney.go.com/cars/#/videos. Lately we showed him one of Skylar's favorite websites when she was in preschool called Poisson Rouge or Red Fish. http://www.poissonrouge.com/ He's getting quite smart about it. Then there is the Itouch. One year for Christmas we bought James an Itouch because we thought it had the best of all worlds pertaining to James... Apps, Music, Videos, Games, Drawing... etc. Rick and I thought we were being sneaky and also got one for each other without us knowing. Mine died first because it probably had a sippy cup contamination. Then Rick's was replaced twice and died as well so he had James Itouch (James got an Iphone less than a year later.) Now Rick who pretty much can't function without his other brain aka Iphone has given me James hand me down Itouch which I love to use for music and Words for Friends but I rarely use it and find myself keeping William entertained with it. He likes to use the preschool applications for puzzles and shape sorting and has mastered so many of them I have had to pay for the app instead of using the lite version LOL!

PS I get my Iphone so we don't have to worry about loosing the Itouch in a month

In Memory of Lily Bird

Lily 11/27/2002- 7/31/2011

Mil Spouse Friday Fill in

By Wife of a Sailor

1. Facebook or Twitter?
Facebook the Twitter world is still a bit confusing

2. Hard Tacos or Soft Tacos?
Soft only

3. Gardening or crafting?
crafting

4. Fruit or vegetables?
Fruit. I love my vegetables for sure, but I love the sweetness of fruit. <~ I agree

5.  Motorcycle or bicycle?
I haven't ridden on a Motorcycle since I was very young. I promised someone I wouldn't ride after a family friend lost his leg to a Harley. I drool over them though... I did ride bikes a lot before moving to Huntsville now I wish I had a bike. We have a bike trailer for the kids, a bike car seat for just William but no BIKES! Maybe perhaps one day I would like a Harley trike :p

Love this quote

‎"Never forget, when you have lost your faith, when God is no longer real to you, go back. Go back to the last place you saw Him. He will be waiting for you there."

Remember-able Moments

I haven't had much time to blog but a few weeks ago Rick was backing up and backed up my Honda into our wrought iron Mailbox and scratched her back end and dented her pretty good. I wasn't even sure I wanted to pay the premium to get her fixed (her body looks great before the accident but the inside is trashed). We ended up going to get the estimate I told the guy my trunk wasn't opening so he offered to fix that as well as my drivers side door that wouldn't open from the inside... We paid for the extra jobs but USAA paid for the dent repair and the rental. We were at Enterprise getting our rental and I found out my license was expired so we had to use Rick's license then we drove to the DMV to get my license removed... Its official I've had my license for four years officially and it expired the day before my birthday..... in April.... OOPS! Thank you Enterprise for alerting me before the Police had to remind me to renew HAHA!. So it looks like my first renewal was as remember-able as getting my license for all of you who know what a journey that was!!

By the way Rick and I have always said the next car we buy will be a Ford... big enough for our entire family. They picked us up from Joe Hudson Collision in I think it was a Ford Edge- it could have been a Flex? It had luxury amenities including a camera that you can see behind you when you backed up, a voice activated GPS and more. OMG nice! We ended up renting a Mazda 5 though and it was a pretty sweet ride and about 10 k less than a Ford Suv... Who knows what we will get when we are in the market for it in 2 years. I think Ford is the more responsible choice though.

Addiction

Amy Winehouse 14 September 1983-  23 July 2011 (aged 27)

I have seen the first hand tragedy of addiction. I have not had a serious addiction myself but I have seen others struggle with it and it  forever changed my own life and compromised my life and not being able to live the fullest life possible. After Heath Ledger died of an "accidental overdose" I mourned. What a huge loss to us as a star was being born. He was so talented and overlooked. The Michael Jackson and every claimed he had a problem and died from an overdose. Sure he had a type of a drug problem same as his famous father in law Elvis who I love. He wanted drugs to kill the demons certainly of his past. Elvis became addicted because of the Army. Either way addiction is addiction... Brittany Spears, Lindsay Lohen, Kurt Cobain and other famous rock stars.  I watched as a youth watched Kurt Cobain basically fall apart of course through the media. Of course he tried to get help and wasn't successful. I have seen addiction in my family, my friends, my relationships. Amy Winehouse was so destructive I wouldn't even buy her music to support her addiction. I was embarrassed for her and sick for her. She was often the brunt of jokes I admit but addiction isn't a laughing matter and the fact that her song about her addiction made her famous. I wasn't surprised that she passed away this week. I had asked Rick which one would go first Lindsay or Amy.  Its sad the world had to loose talent after to talent to something that can be fixed, cured, and prevented. I don't "get" drug addiction and I don't think I ever will. I have my demons and drugs don't make them disappear it just adds more skeletons in your closet.
Russell Brand whom I see (I don't know much about) as a dorky weird guy married to Katy Perry and an Actor or Comedian (maybe a stretch) in his own right that has done things for MTV time to time wrote a beautiful blog to Amy Here its well versed and he is more intelligent than I thought. After alll it shouldn't matter so much as who died or what were the circumstances of their demise but to the public eye that didn't know Amy and shouldn't judge Amy take this time to reach out to someone you know struggling with addiction and ask them to get help. Don't enable them. Pray for a recovery.

Military Monday

I just got a book I ordered called Military Love Loving You From A Distance. I read the first paragraph and I loved it... so I thought I would share...

The love of my life is a hero. He doesn't wear a cape but he models cammies every day. He doesn't rock the newest designer shoes but instead he laces up his combat boots no matter how uncomfortable they are. He doesn't have the newest hair style because he has regulations he has to abide by daily. He has to wake up before sunrise so he could go to PT than he endures a long day at work. He signed up to ensure that freedom of speech never gets belittled. Sometimes with that freedom he is protecting, people speak words of disrespect towards him. He has to leave home to fight a war he was not sure if he believed in. ...

I just thought it was touching and beautiful as well as the rest of the introduction. The book is entries of different military love stories. I am on love story #4.  Not every story is for me but so far I like this book. I belong to a Facebook group called Military Love. Thats how I found out the book. Aparently when she started the group, she started a traveling notebook.. one got stolen, they were worn out and beaten so she decided the best way to do was virtually through an email address and she compiled all the stories into this book. Again the book is called Military Love: Loving You From A Distance and its by Samantha Rehder and the rest of the wives who submitted their stories. The book is available at Lulu.com and she also now has calendars out too!.

What's your military love story? Would you share it in a book?

My Military Love story is...Rick my husband was stationed in Korea and he was pretty bored so he was looking for blogs to read on Yahoo 360. He found my blog and started reading. I was writing about life, my bad relationship, my struggles with my ex and parent hood. He finally started leaving comments and so I read his blog too! The first comments came in December of 05. By the summer of 2006 it was time for him to leave Korea and he was being stationed in Alabama just 3/4 hours away! We begun to talk more in IM just platonic since I was in a relationship and he was trying to find his own love for a lifetime time of love. He was having problems with it and he would admit himself that he was in a destructive downward spiral. I wasn't handling things too well either. In December of 2006 he told he heard rumors he might deploy but not to worry too much because it would probably be to the green zone. I DID worry. I have friends and family that have deployed and I have never worried so much as I did this stranger... I only knew Rick virtually. I spoke to my two best friends Kristin and Olenka about what was going on and showed them the emails and I was at the point of ending my relationship. I asked for my mother for a loan to help me get my own place with my daughter and help me out. She told me to wait till after the holidays. My boyfriend was abusing xanax and alcohol. It was becoming more and more abusive and controlling. I wasn't getting hours at either of my two jobs. Things weren't well. I went to stay with my sister for a few days just to get my head on things. This was about Martin Luther King Weekend. Rick had a four day weekend and decided we should meet. He thought maybe I could just house sit while he was deployed and get back on my own feet with no strings attached. No relationship.. I wasn't looking for anything but standing on my own two feet. Again I pleaded with Olenka and Kristin and they could tell I had already fallen even if I denied it. They said it was Kismet and I had to meet him or I would forever regret it.

We met that weekend and we planned on having dinner and just talking about the possiblity of me moving to Redstone with Skylar and house sitting. At the time he knew he had to leave his boys who were 19 & 20 alone but he thought htey could handle themselves and I would just be making sure that everything was okay while he was deployed. Crazy things happened that weekend that weren't what I planned dealing with police, my adopted mother, my ex boyfriend (we broke up before New Years Eve), and my sister. Things got out of hand and my daughter was in danger. I literally packed what I could carry and Rick called James and Alex and told them I was in a bad situation and he was bringing us home. Everything seemed meant to be and it was so wonderful we got married on Feburary 5th of the same year. Alex his oldest son left for boot camp a few days later and Rick left for training to join his MiTT Team in Kansas by July 22, 2007. He deployed to Taji Iraq October of 2007. Alex left for Korea for a year a few weeks later. He came back to Alabama to visit with James, Skylar & I before leaving for Korea after he graduated from AIT (Advanced Individual Training).

During my first deployment I learned so much about my marriage, my step sons, my own self and my daughters strength. I will never forget how I grew and how we grew as a couple that year. I hope we can get back to that.

Coming home on a 4 day weekend from Training Summer of 2007

R&R on our 1st Anniversary Feb 2008

Shortly after we met

Fill in the Blank Friday

1.   I am a (morning, evening, middle of the day person)       I am not a morning person I am a groggy mess in the mornings. In the afternoons the kids usually run me ragged and I am tired with a headache, Night time I am exhausted...

2.  My favorite Pandora stations are    I just made one yesterday consisting of Rock like 90's rock... Nickelback, 3 Doors Down, Evanescence, Matchbox Twenty, Live, Hinder, Train, Fuel, Goo Goo Dolls,  Breaking Benjamin, Tonic, & 30 Seconds to Mars etc...

3.  3 of my "must-have" songs for a road trip playlist are    . 30 Seconds to Mars, Across the Universe Soundtrack, and Adele Someone Like You

4.  My favorite pattern is   Java Blue by Vera Bradley

5.  My favorite perfume is     I have a few I rotate. My four all time favorites are 
Anais Anais Perfume by Cachare, CK One, Pink Musk (or Peony)  by Avon, and Bella by Mary Kay. I also use Katy Perry, White Diamonds, and Brittany Spears. I think I've had Celine Dion's at one time but I can't remember how it smelled. I love Sunflowers as well

6.  Rules are      set to make people accountable for their actions.

7.  My most overused phrase or punctuation is      LOL or the F word...

Mil Spouse Friday Fill IN

From Wife of a Sailor

This week’s questions are:




1. If you could have a private concert with any singer, who would it be? submitted by An Air Force Wife’s Blog

He's dead but if he were still alive I would have to say Elvis Presley or maybe Michael Jackson. I had to pick them because in my mind no one has become the icon that they have. I am not sure I could choose just 1 person that is still alive. Maybe James Durbin?


2. Is there anything you do to supplement your family’s income? submitted by Our Life, One Adventure at a Time

I am a Close to My Heart Consultant but I haven't made any money off of it as I haven't been pushing it in the last few years due to having William etc. I also sell my crafts and hand me downs online and at Consignments.


3. During your pregnancy (whether past, present, or future), what did you nickname your unborn baby before you knew the sex? submitted by Explosions of Love

Mackenzie didn't have one that I can remember. Skylar was Peanut, Bunny, and finally Skylar. William was Peridot (his birth stone)


4. Have you ever won a blog giveaway? If so what did you win? submitted by Mrs. O’s Life

I wish!


5. If I looked into your refrigerator right now, what would I find? submitted by Married to the Army

Coca Cola is my addiction, Lactaid Whole Milk for William, a gallon of 2% Milk, and a half Gallon of whole milk (James' my 23 year old), OJ, James wine coolers, cheese, ham, condiments, fruit cups, Bottled Water, White Grape Juice, James' food not sure what all he has in there he hasn't been shopping in a few weeks.


Please don’t forget to add your blog link to Mr. Linky below by clicking on it. But also if you are not participating in MilSpouse Friday Fill-In this week, please do not put your link on there… I will remove it. It is unfair to others who do participate.

Jesus Take the Wheel

For those of you who have read my blog or know me I am sorry if this entry is particularly repetitive. But things that may seem like deja vu are symbolic to the make up that is me and big building blocks in that is that is my faith.

Years ago I read a book called "Gianna". I was inspired by this young woman who's mother tried to abort her and she was born with several birth defects and would never live a "normal" life. She is so brave and so strong in the book she talks about "giving it to God". This was a foreign concept to me. I attended the same church up until adult hood. I was unable in my marriage to attend church freely as I chose. I started attending Trinity Community Church after Adam died. It is the church that watched me grow up and blossom. The church at least some of the members that had known me since I was a toddler. They came to my wedding, to my birthday parties as a child and always supported my family. Eventually I had to move back to where I was living in North Georgia and I didn't have a church home again. My faith had been shaken by the death of my husband, by my separation from him, and the custody battle with my son I eventually lost. I lost my husband and oldest son in the same year. My family had pretty much turned their back on me. My faith was shaken but not gone. Even though I had been through really serious trials, and tests of my faith... its all I had that was TRUE. Its all I had to hold on to. Nothing else promised me it would all work out, that it would all be okay.

Even though I lost my oldest son I still at the time had a little baby (Skylar who is now 8½), living in a different town. I was dating a man who had addictions and problems. Perhaps the only people that can handle my baggage are those who have baggage themselves? He was raised Catholic but like Adam I think he was Atheist. Having my brief few weeks back at Trinity made me realize how good going to church was for my soul. It was like an energizer battery... it gave me energy and strength to go on. I wanted to continue this with my daughter. I was in an impossible relationship for nearly 5 years before it ended. Before it had ended Skylar who was a sippy cup addict would drink chocolate milk at all hours through those Nuby Sippy Cups and it caused cavities even though she would brush brush brush... her molars were damaged. So at 3½ she had to have a lot of baby teeth pulled and filled. She had to go under general anesthesia. With my 20+ surgeries I was scared for her. I cried I was a mess. I remembered Gianna and I prayed and asked friends and people online how do I give it to God? Then I heard "Jesus Take the Wheel" by Carrie Underwood. I got some answers and just prayed please get me out of this impossible relationship that puts myself and Skylar at risk. Let her get through this simple procedure without any complications. I cannot loose ANOTHER child. She was pretty much the only earthly thing I had left to keep me going. Eventually I chose to end that relationship and move to Alabama.

Prayers Answered!

I married a Soldier who deployed just months after our wedding. I once again was scared I couldn't handle it. I was scared I would fall apart and wouldn't be able to hold the weight on my shoulders. I was in a new city, no friends, a new step child (or two), a new life all together. I took it in force and I didn't back down. I had stumbles on my journey but I didn't get off the slippery rocks I kept trucking across all with Skylar in tow. She handled it beautifully as well.

4 years later I find myself troubled again. I find myself asking questions and doctors not having the answers. I am not given the answers to the questions. I want help... I beg and a plead. I was driving Skylar to Vacation Bible School (Yes I am back to attending church whenever possible. I couldn't make it without Willowbrook Baptist Church.) "Revelation Song" by Kari Jobe came on. This is a song last year that I would have daily prayer and meditation too. If I did my prayer, praise music, and meditation my day just seemed more complete and fulfilling. Anywhere hearing my song on the radio I realized I hadn't trusted and put my faith in God once again. I failed on my promise to not go down that road and to let him take the wheel. I didn't give my worries to him I let them burden me. I let them tie me down. Its been months I have been struggling especially lately. Its been building but lately its been extra difficult. That day going to VBS I broke down in tears driving and almost had to pull over realized I failed on my faith again because to have worry isn't to trust in HIM. I am so broken without faith. I've been trying to pull it together now but every time I think I take a step forward I take two steps backward and the journey seems to be more difficult. Between medical problems, problems in my relationships, emotional stress... its been a hard rucksack to carry. My burdens are heavy but my faith is still plenty when I choose to see it. I am working on that...

I used to have a sign growing up on my bedroom door... Be Patient God isn't finished with me yet.. I need a new one!

""There are a lot of things to think about, but nothing to worry about." Matt Koepke

Wordless Wednesday

Worry Free Wednesday

1. I will try not to worry that my car is on her last legs after she locked up on me today and the air bag light probably means my air bag is malfunctioning some how.. ugh
2. I will try not to worry about how tight money has been this summer we will get back on track soon.
3. I will try not to worry about the second grade the eleventh is a lot scarier
4. I will try not to worry that William is delayed or growing... or not.
5. I will try to live in a moment, plan for tomorrow, and know that the past is what it is.
6. I will try not to worry about people who are no longer in my life... giving it to God
7.http://www.lifecoachingforchristianwomen.com/tag/worry-free-wednesdays/

Cats On Tuesday

We've had Tinker Bell for 4 years and she has never had a problem with her fur well apparently we took her to the Catisfaction Cat Clinic a few weeks ago and she has a problem with her undercoat getting knotted. She got her usual boosters and exam and let me tell you I love this clinic and its staff. Everyone is awesome. Next to go is Peanut because he tends to get out of the house more than the females.